I love sound. The wind whistling in the leaves, the ocean crashing on the beach, the birds singing in the trees, or even the buzz of New York City traffic. At the right time and in reasonable amounts, each murmur, hum, or note provides a soothing backdrop to my life. The soundtrack orients me. It keeps me focused and helps my mind stay alert to the present moment.
I hadn’t realized how important these background sounds were to my daily life until one day, they were gone. A much-needed break from my devices, caused by extra fluid in my ears that needed time to dissipate, left me in relative silence. I didn’t like it.
Silence is Not Always Golden
I noticed the difference immediately. I felt off balance. Scattered. Uneasy. Less connected to my surroundings. Since I usually wear my devices 24/7, it was disorienting for people around me, too.
My husband needed to pull out his top-notch communication best practices—get my attention first, speak clearly and enunciate, make sure your face is visible—and use them every minute of the day. I could tell it was exhausting for him. And for me as well, because communication reminders were needed much more than is typical.
Work was ok—I usually write in silence—but without the comfort of everyday background sounds, I felt restless. It was hard to concentrate because I kept scanning the area for anything unusual.
Was someone talking to me?
Did I hear the doorbell?
Is water running in the kitchen?
A repairman arrived. I explained the issue with our screen door and that it would be extra hard for me to understand him today because my hearing aids were “on break.” He tried to speak louder. I could tell he was working at it. But it was difficult and awkward, in part because I was making him nervous by standing so close to him so I could hear him.
Meals were more silent. Yoga class was more solitary. Life felt lonelier because I was disconnected from my surroundings.
Making it an early night, I tumbled into bed, grateful the day was over and looking forward to getting my “ears” back tomorrow.
Our Three-Legged Stool of Communication Skills
Without my devices, conversation of any kind was more exhausting because while hearing technology does not solve all communication issues, it certainly helps.
In Hear & Beyond: Live Skillfully with Hearing Loss, technology is one of the three critical legs in our formula for skillful living. The other two are MindShifts (holding a constructive and proactive attitude about your hearing loss) and Communication Game Changers (communication behaviors like letting others know about your hearing loss or picking the right seat at the table).
When we use all three together, communication and connection are much easier.
Readers, how do you react to a day without your devices?
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That sounds like an exhausting day!
The only time I ever go without my hearing aids is when I need to walk the dog and it’s raining in the summer and too hot for a jacket with a hood. I feel so vulnerable without them in.
Since I got my aids, I’ve never gone a full day without them. Sometimes I’ll leave them out when I’m home but then my tinnitus gets louder because I can’t hear any background noise that usually does a little masking.
It was! Let’s hope it will be a while before the next time! Thank you for sharing your experiences!
My first devices were Phonak Lyric. I will never forget the first day after 27 years of hearing NOTHING! The sound of the trees, the falling water, the sound of skateboard wheels—without a doubt, it felt like being born again. Technology is our ally; it has given us back hope in the silence.
Well said. Thanks for sharing your thoughts.
Shari, Do you wear your hearing aids to bed? You say you wear them 24/7…….. just curious. Thanks, Winona Stewart
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I do! They are a special type of extended wear hearing aids called Lyrics. Thank you for your question.
Wow – sound 24-7! But, I don’t think I’d like it. I love my ability to just “turn the world off” aka “take my hearing aids off.” Suddenly the thumping dryer is still. The neighbors are much quieter, traffic noise abates. Peaceful. My friends envy me. Easier to sleep, too, though sometimes I play white noise to keep my tinnitus company. And occasionally I turn my HAs off when I’m around irritating people who talk a lot but don’t say much. Otherwise they’re exhausting. My friends envy me that, too. I’d rather have good hearing, but given what I’ve got, I make a point of enjoying the small pleasures. But I hope you got your 24/7s — and your best hearing — back ASAP.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts! Each of us has our own way to make things work! We can learn from one another.
I am bi-modal with a cochlear implant and hearing aid. In the early stages of my hearing loss journey, I was filled with anxiety when the hardware was removed and tinnitus was more present. I would wear them 24/7 just like you, but as time went on, the fear and anxiety subsided. I lost the fear of the tinnitus which changed my reaction to when I was unplugged 🙂 Still wake up grateful for these devices.
Thank you for sharing your journey!
I don’t think I’ll be able to sleep wearing hearing aids at night. But don’t remove them during the day if I can help me. I just feels to disconnected!
Thank you for sharing your thoughts.
I wear CHIs (Cochlear Hybrid Implants). I actually have very little hearing left, but under perfect conditions I can hear enough of the words to process what my husband is saying. This past spring I had lots of pain from my left CHI and thought the magnet was too strong, so I tried many options. I went to the ENT and he thought the audiologist should help me. Well, by the end of the summer the internal implant started to break through my scalp. The ENT told me to stop wearing it immediately and I had surgery the beginning of December to remove it and another surgeon made a fold (a new home) for a new CHI. I am still waiting for my scalp to heal. Hopefully in March I will have a new CHI inserted, so I can hear again. The effect is horrific. I need both CHIs for hearing and processing, struggling with balance, socialization, and I am becoming depressed. I am very hopeful and dedicated to my audio rehabilitation, so I know I will regain my ability to hear/process again. I do enjoy at the end of the day a period of silence, so I can relax before going to bed.
I am sorry to hear about the troubles with your CHIs and am glad that help is on the way. Thank you for sharing your story.