I just returned from the American Academy of Audiology’s annual conference, where I had the opportunity to present on one of my favorite topics: how our attitudes about hearing loss shape everything — our confidence, our relationships, our willingness to try new tools, and ultimately, how well we actually do living with it. It’s a key part of the equation for living skillfully with hearing loss that Gael Hannan and I lay out in our book “Hear & Beyond: Live Skillfully with Hearing Loss.”
Here’s a brief recap of the presentation. Everything I shared with them applies directly to us as well.
It Starts in the Mind
We all know hearing loss is hard. It affects every corner of life — how we see ourselves, how we connect with the people we love, how we navigate work and social situations. And it comes with a lot of heavy emotions: grief, frustration, embarrassment, and sometimes a deep sense of isolation and shame.
These emotions are real and must be acknowledged because the way we think about hearing loss is just as important as the technology we use to manage it. Attitudes shape behaviors. And behaviors determine outcomes.
That’s the idea behind what we call MindShifts.
What Is a MindShift?
A MindShift is a deliberate flip — taking a limiting belief about your hearing loss and transforming it into something more empowering. It doesn’t mean toxic positivity or pretending things aren’t hard. It means choosing a perspective that opens doors instead of closing them.
In “Hear & Beyond,” we lay out 10 of the most common negative attitudes prevalent in our community. At the conference, I highlighted six of them, as well as the MindShifts that can replace them.
“Why me?”
This one is so human. Hearing loss can feel profoundly unfair, especially when it arrives later in life, or suddenly, or without support.
The MindShift: I have the potential to change my journey. The person with the most power in my hearing loss success is me.
“Nobody understands what I’m going through.”
Isolation is one of the most painful parts of hearing loss — and one of the most common. But you are not as alone as you feel.
The MindShift: Many people experience the same challenges I do. I can learn from them. I’m not alone.
This is exactly why community matters so much. Finding your people — whether online or through organizations like HLAA — can be genuinely life-changing.
“I just want to hear better, the way I used to.”
This longing is real and completely understandable. But chasing the past can keep us from building the best possible present.
The MindShift: I want to communicate better — and it takes more than hearing aids to do that. I need to use other skills and tools, too.
“I don’t like to advertise my hearing loss. People will think I’m old or slow.”
Stigma is still very real, and the instinct to hide our hearing loss is one I know personally. But concealment almost always backfires.
The MindShift: Being open about my hearing loss helps me communicate better. Hiding it leads to misunderstandings.
“Hearing aids are ugly, expensive, and don’t always work.”
There’s truth buried in this one — hearing aids are imperfect and the cost can be a real barrier. But leading with frustration keeps us from getting the most out of the tools we have.
The MindShift: Technology is my friend. My devices let me hear sounds I had forgotten, or never heard before. They connect me to people and the world.
“I don’t want to bother anyone with my hearing loss needs.”
This might be the one people feel most deeply. The impulse to shrink, to go along, to not make a fuss. But our needs are legitimate.
The MindShift: I deserve to hear and be heard. I deserve to participate.
How to Make the Shift
Reading a MindShift is one thing. Internalizing it is another. A few things that help:
Aim for better, not perfect. Progress rather than perfection is a sustainable approach. Small improvements add up.
Practice out loud. Use MindShifts as mantras. Say them in the mirror. Write them down. Repetition builds new grooves.
Take care of yourself. Managing hearing loss is exhausting. Sleep, nutrition, mindfulness, and rest aren’t luxuries — they’re tools that make everything else easier.
Give yourself grace. Attitude shifts take time. Be patient with yourself on the hard days.
You Are the Most Important Person in Your Hearing Loss Success
Audiologists, technology, and supportive family members all play a role — but at the center of it all is you. Your mindset. Your willingness to advocate for yourself. And your belief that a good life with hearing loss is possible.
Because it is.
Learn more about MindShifts and their role in skillful living with hearing loss in “Hear & Beyond: Live Skillfully with Hearing Loss.” Available wherever books are sold.
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Making the MindShift from wanting to hear better to wanting to communicate better, that crystalized my courage to self-advocate. Thanks for that bit of advice!
Amazing! So glad that resonated with you as well! Thank you for your comment.